To let go of the past is important, as holding onto it blocks you completely. Even though you accept this intellectually, the pain you are feeling is your emotional resistance to change. Today is painful for you, because you are laying the past to rest and with that you initiate the change you are trying to resist.
Everything you have experienced, as painful as it has been, is good, because it has formed you into the wonderful person you are right now. This is something to be truly grateful for. Take the lessons it has taught you, the love you have received and release the pain, hurt, anger, fear and blame.
Let the Five of Summer inspire you to forgive yourself all that you deem as mistakes. The more you forgive yourself and the more grateful you are for all you have learned, the more you are able to let it go. And with that you open new possibilities for yourself and transform your pain into strength and power for right now.
Remember: The more you struggle to hold on to what has gone, the more you suffer. The more you let it go, the stronger you will become.